Sunday, February 10, 2008 @2:26 am
Blah its just one of those nights again.I can't seem to stop thinking.
I can't seem to forgive myself,I was so stupid then.Why did I tread on forbidden greens?
It keeps playing back in my mind,like it was on rewind and playback.
Somehow it doesn't seem like its over.I know God has forgiven me,but what does that help?I can't even forgive myself.
I wish that there was some way,to just erase this all from my memory bank.That way I wouldn't have to suffer day and night when my mind happily triggers this memory.You know,if it was just me alone maybe it would have been ok,I would have moved on from it.But I just had to drag you down with me selfishly.
I feel so inferior,to everyone around me.I look at them and wonder what they think of me and realize that I'm so beneath them.Because of what I've done.Selfish-ness.
I want to forget it all.Why did I just jump in to things?
I want this to end.
But it doesn't seem to have an ending.